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About Varied / Professional Member SchizmaticMale/United States Recent Activity
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Underhanded Politics by schizmatic
Underhanded Politics
This is why if I get a smart watch, I might alternate wearing it on my left and right wrists. Though, if I spend ten thousand dollars on an Apple Watch, they'll probably both strangle me with their bare hands.

Image: schizmatic.com/files/underhand… Page: schizmatic.com/comics/777

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Cosmically Myopic #2 by schizmatic
Cosmically Myopic #2
The Hubble Space Telescope was launched on April 24, 1990, and had initial blurriness issues from flaws in its main mirror. NASA astronauts fixed the issues in a series of heroic space missions, but it's still disappointing that they didn't upgrade the entire telescope into a full-blown imperial TIE fighter with ion engines and laser cannons.

I expect more bang from my taxpayer buck.

Image: schizmatic.com/files/cosmicall… Page: schizmatic.com/comics/776

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Aloha Ackbar by schizmatic
Aloha Ackbar
For the record, the Rebel Alliance was NOT a terrorist organization, although even the tightest security checkpoint would have a blind spot for a cuddly Ewok concealing a dozen thermal detonators in its fur.

Image: schizmatic.com/files/aloha_ack… Page: schizmatic.com/comics/775

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The Salad Sundae by schizmatic
The Salad Sundae
Ranch dressing is the "a la mode" for appetizers.

And technically, you could make a deconstructed breakfast using bacon bits, egg slices, and croutons, and still say you just had the salad bar. Not to mention, count it toward your workout routine by "exercising" your creativity.

Image: schizmatic.com/files/the_salad… Page: schizmatic.com/comics/774

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Embracism by schizmatic
Embracism
A racist is only bigoted against particular races, but an "embracist" is an equal asshole towards all. It's deplorable, but admirably deplorable.

Image: schizmatic.com/files/embracism… Page: schizmatic.com/comics/773

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So, I've been spamtastically posting five strips a day to catch up with a backlog I had, and to avoid potential weirdness like people wondering why I'm still doing comic strips about the Olympics at the end of September:

"Wow, did he just get around to watching it on his DVR?  It must've been tough avoiding all the Michael Phelps spoilers everywhere..."

But now I can slow it down to posting a strip a day, and eventually settle in to four a week.  Though, I have to admit, speed-watching the Olympics on DVR fast-forward does sound pretty interesting: the marathon would become a long-distance sprint, and the 100-meter dash a race of superheroes.

Still, even in normal speed, Usain Bolt might be able to give the Flash a run for his money.

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schizmatic
Schizmatic
Artist | Professional | Varied
United States
Schizmatic is a webcomic of intelligent weirdness based on blueprint schematics applied to actual life. It puts the cosmos under a microscope, and reality under analysis -- goodness knows it needs it.
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:iconscoundrel47:
Scoundrel47 Featured By Owner Apr 10, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks for the fave. 
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:iconhitmonchanda:
HitmonchanDA Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2015  New member Student General Artist
What is the definition of America before 1776?
Reply
:iconschizmatic:
schizmatic Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2015  Professional General Artist
Before 1776, America was a collection of British colonies, though I think mad King George III considered America his giant turnip garden. X)
Reply
:iconhitmonchanda:
HitmonchanDA Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2015  New member Student General Artist
So what about the Spanish and French colonies? Aren't they technically america?
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:iconschizmatic:
schizmatic Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2015  Professional General Artist
Yeah, I think they called the whole New World, America, named after this Italian dude, Amerigo Vespucci.
Reply
(1 Reply)
:icondlebedkin1993:
Dlebedkin1993 Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
I appreciate your attention, may I add you to my friendlist?
Reply
:iconschizmatic:
schizmatic Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2015  Professional General Artist
Absolutely. New friends are always welcome!
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:icondlebedkin1993:
Dlebedkin1993 Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Glad to hear this, dear comrade)
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:iconbenmonster2000:
BENmonster2000 Featured By Owner Mar 11, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you so much for the watch and favs!
Pleased 
Reply
:iconmasterploxy:
MasterPloxy Featured By Owner Mar 10, 2015  Hobbyist Artist
You are so Blue, Light Blue in fact.
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